God is the sames yesterday, today and tomorrow.
God provides blessings on our bad days as well as our good days.
I read a devotional for widows today that talks about a “widow blessing”, but I think the concept applies to anyone after a bad thing has happened.
A widow blessing, as I understand it, is something that is good after, and really due to, the death.
For example, one might love sleeping in, but the deceased spouse used to get up early and make lots of noise.
It can be so, so hard to apprecite the blessing of sleeping in, because you would trade a lifetime of sleeping in, for one more hour with your husband, and you would give anything to have him wake you up loudly singing in the morning.
Life insurance can be a widow blessing. For me, being able to develop friendships with new friends, is a widow blessing. And I’ve had so many others.
It’s a true and good blessing, but it can feel so wrong being grateful for it at times.
But it’s not wrong to be grateful. It’s actually so right.
I wouldn’t have my new car if he was still alive. Of course, I’d drive a car tied together with bungee cords for the rest of my life for one more minute to hug him, look into his eyes and tell him I love him. But I still also have to be grateful for the blessing of this reliable car.
It can be so hard to hold both truths in my mind at the same time, without holding them both under the umbrella of “God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.” God sends blessings today, as well as yesterday. There is still good after his death, as well as before. I can enjoy stretching out alone in a big bed at the same time I’d give anything to be laying in his arms.
This is not the life I wanted, but I can still be grateful for the life that it is. Evil took my husband away. This world is broken. But I still have a choice to focus on evil and become bitter or focus on good and be grateful for the blessings as they come.
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies they never come to an end, They are new every morning, New every morning, Great is they faithfulness O Lord, Great is thy faithfulness