Grief

My Valentine

Shah’s mother sent me this photo. Eight and a half months is an exhausting time to cry and yet I cry with no end in sight. I miss him with every breath. He is the best. 

This photo was taken on top of the tallest mountain in Turkey, days after our official engagement. Our honeymoon was cut short because we had to get back to close on our house. We always thought we would do one “in a few years” and had planned our 20 year anniversary trip. I won’t be able to be in his arms for any of those trips, but at least we had an amazing engagement trip. 

Last year, we had what I described as a perfect Valentine’s Day, with rest, exploring, good food, and time with Zoya. We were glad we took her with us to a very nice dinner. I’m even more glad this year, because it is one bit of our tradition that I can continue. 

Not everyone is lucky enough to be with their love this year. But if you are, focus on giving, not getting; gratefulness, not expectations. What can you give this year that you might not have a chance to give next year?

About Camila

Based in Atlanta, but from the mountains of North Carolina. New widow of a man from Iran. Mother of one precious girl. Anti-human trafficking expert. Sister to 16 siblings (Yes, some of are adopted). Daughter of God.

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