Grief Travel

She’s My Motivation

Three years ago, we told our parents we were pregnant. It took us a few days to do a full FB announcement. Now I’m with our little girl, visiting his family, and he is gone. 

And I’m okay. I mean I cried for an hour today, and I’ve rarely been quite so exhausted, and I miss him so much breathing is hard, and I’m totally confused and in need of some time to process my own thoughts. 

But I’m great. 

This little girl is my everything. She makes me smile. She gets me out of bed. I’ll do just about anything for her laugh. 

Despite the exhaustion, traveling with her is one of my very favorite things in life.  I imagine it will be even better as she is able to understand more and more. But even at age 2, I have someone to delight with me in the beauty of tomatoes and to encourage me to take lots of breaks at the park.

Someday when I look back at this trip I will mostly remember the highlights that are posted in the picture.  And that’s okay. It isn’t because I didn’t properly record the exhaustion, but because exploring with her is the only thing that really matters.  I don’t mean to present a false image when I post bunch of idealic photos of Zoya playing with her grandparents. I’m just trying to overlook the exhaustion and the petty annoyances, because her joy is what matters.

2 comments on “She’s My Motivation

  1. Breathe my dear. Hold on, joy comes in the mourning.


  2. I’m so sorry. 😕 You have a wonderfil outlook with your daughter. May God bless you through your trials.


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