Things I don’t want to forget.


I don’t want to forget a moment of this or a word your daddy says.
Tonight he told me he didn’t want it to go back to being just the two of us because it was even better with three. Not only do we love you, we love each other more because you are with us.
When he was walking around tonight and finally made you quit screaming, it was so beautiful. He is learning you.
He misses us so much when he is at work.
He was so amazed the first day at how much you changed our whole world. All he wanted in the whole world was for you to be ok, to be happy and healthy.
And today, while we waited for you to pee again, nothing in the world was as important as you peeing. And the joy on his face when you did pee for him was beautiful.
He also told me on the first day that there was no way you were going to daycare. He’s been willing to stay home with you for several months but I don’t think he knew how important it would be to him to keep you safe.
I’d like nothing in the world more than to stay home with you. It’s been my life’s dream. But for now, it seems God has had other plans and daddy will get to stay with you while I work. Because your daddy is so wonderful, I’m at peace with thay. Someday I want to be home with you, but for now God has given me the best man I’m the world to take care of you when I can’t be with you. You are a very blessed child.
We have hardly slept in the last 3 days but even when it’s possible to sleep it is so hard for us to quit staring at you.
You’ve been up from 11-4am both nights since we have been home, and daddy is working so he has slept part of that time. I used to be miserable if I didn’t sleep but I’ve found staying awake with you to be one of the best parts of my day. The rest of the time your Nana is helping, and it’s been wonderful, I couldn’t do it without her help. But 3am is our time. It’s my time to enjoy you. It’s the time I can just rock you and sing to you and I’m not trying to get a fast nap in or take care of a health issue or do anything else in the hour you give me between feedings.
I love you Zoya May. Now please pee for mama.

About Camila

Based in Atlanta, but from the mountains of North Carolina. New widow of a man from Iran. Mother of one precious girl. Anti-human trafficking expert. Sister to 16 siblings (Yes, some of are adopted). Daughter of God.

0 comments on “Things I don’t want to forget.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: