Grief

Just This Moment

I feel like a lot of people could benefit from being reminded, or for the first time hearing, some of the most important advice I received after my husband was killed. Be in this moment. God is giving you grace to survive and praise him for this hour.

Of course, I had heard this before said other ways, ‘don’t worry about tomorrow,’ ‘each day has enough trouble of its own,’ ‘you don’t know what tomorrow will bring’ and ‘give us this day our DAILY bread.’ But it was the wise people who asked how I was doing at THIS moment from time to tim after Shah died and who taught me to notice how all of the emotions comes in waves, that helped this truth sink in.

So whether you are new to grief and the trauma caused by sudden change, or have suffered for years, but find so many things in the world have changed, I ask you, “How are you doing right now?”

Whether you are miserable in excruciation pain, fear, and panic, or are having a pleasant afternoon after a decent meal, just be in this moment. You only have the grace to deal with the pain, fear, and panic of this moment and right now all you have to make it through is the next minute.

It can be so easy right now to get caught up in wondering how we will survive Easter alone or the next three weeks alone, or what we will do if this lasts for months and months. You don’t know what will come tomorrow. Whether it will be joy or pain, a special surprise or monotony, all you have the grace to handle is what you are experiencing at this moment.

Widows have to learn this. The thought of this loneliness extending for the rest of our life is unbearable, because at that moment we only have the grace to make it through the next night, or maybe just the next hour. So often we aren’t even lonely in the moment, but we are suffering from the anticipated loneliness we expect to come.

Yes, Sunday may be awful. You may be completely alone or you may be with people. who. are driving you crazy. But God will not give you grace to deal with Sunday until Sunday. Praise God today.

God gives daily bread. He is with you in your present. He is not going to give you the strength you need for three weeks from now, today.

So again, how are you today?

About Camila

Based in Atlanta, but from the mountains of North Carolina. New widow of a man from Iran. Mother of one precious girl. Anti-human trafficking expert. Sister to 16 siblings (Yes, some of are adopted). Daughter of God.

7 comments on “Just This Moment

  1. This is such wisdom. Elizabeth Elliot said “Do the next thing” when we are overwhelmed with grief, fear, uncertainty, whatever we face. God is present in this moment. Blessings to you, Camila.

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    • Thanks! I’m not sure you are in a season to watch Frozen II but it’s such an interesting time for Do the Next Right Thing to be a hit song.

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  2. God wants us to be honest but also healthy emotionally. Glad you are still writing.

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